Dumbass moms/dads encouraging dumbass kids

MiChuhSuh · Unread post by **MiChuhSuh** » May 30th, 2007, 3:46 pm

... and their supposed to be the "guardians." It's disgusting.

How do you prevent stupidity when the parents encourage it, have their kids doing stupid shit, intoxicating themselves, banging, having their daughters f*cking around at a young age. It's sickening. Someone a couple years ago got like 100 charges against him for all these robberies, and his mom bangs too - how do you think his little brother and sister are gonna turn out?

Unread post by **A Ghost** » May 30th, 2007, 6:52 pm

This is a serious topic so Im not gonna joke.

I was originally gonna say "blame Canada"

BUT, that is truly sad when that crap happens.

Sometimes the apple doesnt fall far from the tree

NikexCortez · Unread post by **NikexCortez** » May 30th, 2007, 7:02 pm

Yea this is sad and I believe this effects most families in the inner city. Do yall believe its really the parents fault?

Unread post by **A Ghost** » May 30th, 2007, 7:06 pm

NikexCortez wrote:Yea this is sad and I believe this effects most families in the inner city. Do yall believe its really the parents fault?

Yes.

Its the parents job to break the cycle of ignorance, once you do that you cant work on everything else.

Anesis · Unread post by **Anesis** » May 31st, 2007, 6:24 am

There's really not much you can do, except be an example that different lifestyles do exist out there.

I think just the fact that I'm 28, single, and have no children (and straight) is blasphemous to most of the population I deal with.

When I talk to them, I don't focus on what they are doing wrong,;I focus on the positive: independence, control, things like that. For example, when they talk to me about drugs, I tell them that I am a control freak and that I don't want to do anything that would jeopardize me not being in control. I tell them there is a time and a place for everything, and getting high before they come to my class is neither the time nor the place. I tell them stories of watching women jump from one man to another, because they can't afford to live on their own, and I tell them that I don't depend on anyone, that I look after myself.

Many of the kids that I teach have already matured past their parents and are trying to help out younger brothers and sisters, but there is only so much they can do. No matter how badly you want it, the person you want to help has to want it. From what I've seen, most people need to hit rock bottom before they are ready to make changes in their lives.

But also realize that helping people is a draining job. Sometimes, you can get over involved. You need to learn when to cut and run. Many people in situations like this are very manipulative, and even if you think they are trying to make a chance in their lives, they are just giving you a dog and pony show to make you think that.

I hope that doesn't sound callous or uncaring, but as far as I'm concerned, you have to take care of yourself first. How can you possibly take care of others when you are in a state of turmoil. So before you try to help others get their lives together, make sure you have your own life together first.

So, to sum it all up:
1. Be a good example.
2. Don't moralize.
3. Try to keep an objective outlook on the situation so you know when to cut and run.
4. Take care of yourself.

Just a few thoughts to add to a discussion.

Unread post by **Sentenza** » May 31st, 2007, 8:28 am

NikexCortez wrote:Yea this is sad and I believe this effects most families in the inner city. Do yall believe its really the parents fault?

Yea, parents have a huge influence on wether their childs future will be good or bad.

MiChuhSuh · Unread post by **MiChuhSuh** » May 31st, 2007, 12:20 pm

I'll put it this way... it doesn't definitively determine the future of the child in some aspects... but it make it a hell of a lot more difficult. Childhood can deeply influence a person in negative ways. I don't think I even have to name examples.

Unread post by **LcBwC** » May 31st, 2007, 2:12 pm

NikexCortez wrote:Yea this is sad and I believe this effects most families in the inner city. Do yall believe its really the parents fault?

To a certain degree yes. Its the parent's job to instill early values, morals, right and wrong, etc. A child is a blank canvas when they enter the world. Dont know anything, what they learn and accept to be right/wrong as far as behaviors and what they accept is the parents job. When the child grows up they will know how to handle situations they are thrown in.

Unread post by **Mcminister** » May 31st, 2007, 3:16 pm

alot of my friends who are heavy in crime have dads in jail,
i remember in high school,
the people that were considered REAL ( crazy ) niggaz had olda brotha's that were the same, or some family member that were proior to them, usualy its a circle n i never notice it and im sure they dont to

1 time i was watchin some movie called ANIMAL where this dude had a kid and had his murder game strong n all that he got busted , his wife got shot n all that...and his son id think wud see thru his dad's mistakes and change but he turned into the same thing...then it really hit me, we go threw things that shud make us change for the better but we change fo the worse

its fukkkin disgustin to me see'in parents encourage kids to be in gangs dats jst wrong stupid.....i remember i went to visit some fam members in the BRonx, NY n this dude was tellin his son who is like 3 or 4 years old to say my best friend is a mack 10 on camera....shit was pretty funny but wrong.....i told him does he want to c his son in jail, he lik my lil nigga gon be a soldier..

...sometimes i get to thinkin all the weed peeps be smokin be fuckin up they brain cells way too hard

Unread post by **perongregory** » July 9th, 2007, 1:29 am

this is true but it is perpetuated from generation to generation. It takes a superhuman will and want to cahnge your life from the fucked up ways you your, parents, grandparents, and their parents before them have lived their lives. I feel the sickness in the parents and children are just the modern mutation/adaptaion of a root sickness that was layed down and passed on through the generations.

Anesis · Unread post by **Anesis** » July 9th, 2007, 12:56 pm

perongregory wrote:It takes a superhuman will and want to cahnge your life from the #%@& up ways you your, parents, grandparents, and their parents before them have lived their lives.

Quoted for truth.

And if you make those changes in your life, you are going to lose friendships and other relationships that you once valued.

A lot of time, women (or girls) will have a baby because it's something that they can claim as THEIRS. Maybe not property, but something that no one can take away from them. I have seen these mothers sabotage their children's' lives because they don't want to be "abandoned" by their children, even if it's for a good reason, like going away to college.

The one thing I can't stand if to hear people say "I did it; you can too if you just had the willpower." Sometimes, it's not just about willpower. There are all sorts of resources that people don't take into consideration. Sure, money is a big one, but there are also other resources - a basic education, church, family, friends, emotional, etc. So, just because you overcame adversity, doesn't assume that everyone else can do the same thing. Everyone has a different story, a different situation.

Unread post by **perongregory** » July 9th, 2007, 1:00 pm

Anesis wrote:
perongregory wrote:It takes a superhuman will and want to cahnge your life from the #%@& up ways you your, parents, grandparents, and their parents before them have lived their lives.
Quoted for truth.

And if you make those changes in your life, you are going to lose friendships and other relationships that you once valued.

A lot of time, women (or girls) will have a baby because it's something that they can claim as THEIRS. Maybe not property, but something that no one can take away from them. I have seen these mothers sabotage their children's' lives because they don't want to be "abandoned" by their children, even if it's for a good reason, like going away to college.

The one thing I can't stand if to hear people say "I did it; you can too if you just had the willpower." Sometimes, it's not just about willpower. There are all sorts of resources that people don't take into consideration. Sure, money is a big one, but there are also other resources - a basic education, church, family, friends, emotional, etc. So, just because you overcame adversity, doesn't assume that everyone else can do the same thing. Everyone has a different story, a different situation.

exactly, alot of people can not see this... the Institutional factors that act as a strainer. Yeah, some will make it, but the vast majority will remain inside the system designed for them.